I remember not too long ago feeling overwhelmed and lost. I had so much to do and not enough time to do it in. Being a wife and a mother can be overwhelming at times. There is so much that we are responsible for and so much that our family asks of us.
We can get so caught up in getting things done, that we lose sight of why we are doing them in the first place. Can you relate? Have you ever found yourself so focused, that you lose sight of what is truly important? Then you find yourself focused on the wrong things?
We can become so focused on the things that we need to get done, that we lose sight of those around us. I find myself doing this often with my girls. For example, the other day one of my twins asked me to come to the basement with her. I did and I brought my church small group book with me so I could catch up on reading for our meeting the next day.
So, while I’m sitting down reading I noticed her setting up a board game for two players. It seemed odd to me because her sisters were on the other side of the room already playing a game. But hey, my kids do things I find odd all the time so I just went back to reading. Then once she was done, she walks up to me and says, “Mommy, can you play with me?”
In that moment I realized that I went down there focused on the wrong thing. She wanted me to come with her, not just to there, but to play with her. I went to try to get one more thing crossed off my to-do list. I was missing an opportunity to spend quality time with my daughter.
For a stay-at-home mom, that can happen a lot. There can be so much we want and need to get done during the day, that we lose sight of the real reason we are at home. God has blessed us with such an awesome opportunity as moms, and the pressure of trying to get it all done can be too much at times.
Changing Your Focus
For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of the Spirit.
Romans 8:5 (ESV)
We let the pressure of our schedules and the world take our minds off our families and God. There is so much competing for our time and attention. It is so easy to get caught up in the ‘must dos’ in our lives that we miss the ‘get to’s’ in our lives.
Those moments when you have five things to do, but your child walks up to you with a book and asks you to read it. Or those moments when you are in the middle of cooking dinner, and your husband calls you on his drive home wanting to talk.
Yet, instead of telling him you will talk to him when he gets home, you put him on speakerphone so you can talk and cook. Or those moments when you are in the middle of your quiet time with God, and your phone beeps with a message alert but you do not check it.
It is all about changing our perspective and focusing on what truly matters. The list of to-dos will always be there. Yet some of those priceless moments in time with those we love the most may not.
I’d love to hear about a time when you were focused on the wrong thing
and how you overcame it in the comments!
Quiet time is so important to meaningful life.
Yes it is, Lanell.
While I can’t relate to being a mother, this resonates with the way I am living my life at the moment. Lovely post, thank you!
Thanks so much, Valerie. As women, I think we all can get caught up focusing on the wrong things at all points in our lives. I wish this is something I would have learned before having kids. It would have probably helped me move past something that may have been tripping me up along my journey in life. ?
This is something I needed so much right now, today I had an inner fight with myself haha
I’m not a mom or wife, but I’m having a lot of school, life and self issues; today I got mad at myself for being focused on meaninless things, while I got mad with my boyfriend over nothing and realize it was a foolish situation… I was thinking only about me, and just ignore how he felt, guessing that he did it all on purpose :/
So yeah, sometimes we get so in our bad moments, and we don’t even notice when we are wrong! Got some job to do!
I frequently have to remind myself to stop focusing on the wrong things. I keep a running to-do list, and I get so worried with crossing everything off that sometimes I don’t pay as much attention to my son as I should. I have to take a deep breath and remind myself that the laundry can wait–giving my son attention can’t.
Brilliant! Yes we need to change our focus so much so especially lately. Choose love!
First off, I didn’t know you had twins! Such a beautiful family. I can completely relate to your post, Ayanna. My son has been asking me often to come play with him too or “watch me, mom.”
It is a struggle to find a balance among all the many hats we wear but its just really about prioritizing. Making a list and removing the access is a start but I’m definitely being more intentional with blogging so I have more time with my babies 🙂
This is such an important reminder! We are living in a world that pulls our attention in so many different directions. I know I am guilty of this and it is something I am trying so hard to remember!
Some days I wish my patience grew as my to-do list did. Thank you for this reminder. It is so easy to get lost in everything that needs to be done, and not be what I’m called to be- a mom.
I’m so guilty of this and I recently shared about a moment that woke me up. It’s a daily fight, but I am trying to focus on what’s important and what is not worth the worry. Thank you for sharing what many moms struggle with each day.
This was the perfect reminder to me! I’ve really been trying to slow down and focus on spending QUALITY time with my kids lately instead of just multi-tasking with 800 other things on my to-do list. Great post!
Yay! I loved this. Where you put your attention becomes your intention and vice versa!
Wow, this is such a lovely post! We oftentimes get so busy that we lose sight of some of the most important things – or people. Your post is a nice reminder that we should re-focus our attention on what really matters. Besides, it’s so much fun to spend time with the kids! 🙂
This is so great for me in the season of life I’m in right now! Thanks so much for the reminder! <3
Really convicted by this. God bless you
I love this! It speaks volumes to me. Recently, I had to do some reevaluating and put things into perspective. Sometimes we become so consumed with other things that could really take second priorities. Thanks for this reminder.
I can totally relate to this. Sometimes my focus isn’t where it should be. This is a great reminder!
I love this. I was actually telling myself yesterday that I need to focus more and spend uninterrupted time with the children right when I get home from work. Great reinforcement for me.
Hello Ayanna, as a mom of three I can the benefits of trying to remain focused. As the to do lists get longer and the noise from the hustle and bustling of this world get loader I find centering thoughts and prioritizing to be extremely important.
There is so much to do and so little time in a day! I am trying to stay focused!
Great article! So true to get sidetracked…thanks for the gentle reminder!
Great post!! There are so many times that I lose focus on what I needed to do. So many distractions that go on can make that happen. I know there are times I wish I had more time to do things which often make me focus on the wrong things.
Ayanna, I know exactly what you mean. But, I am on the downslope of my mommying days. My 4 sons are all grown and gone except for the youngest who is 17, nearly gone. My husband and I homeschooled all of them, and there was always something for me to do. Many times I found myself so occupied with my to do list that it upset me if I were side tracked by some ‘trivial” game playing. But the Lord convicted me very quickly of that attitude. I learned to stop, listen, and enjoy my time with my family, truly enjoy it. Today, I have many fonds memories, and yes I do miss parenting. Your girls will call you blessed one day, trust me it is worth it all!
Thanks for a sweet glimpse into your daily life as a mother!l
Yes girl !!!!!!!!! Just what I needed to read today. I feel like all too often we DO focus on the wrong things and sometimes we end up neglecting our families….I’m totally guilty of this and I sometimes take my stress out on my kids. We all do
I try to focus on the right things. Family is number 1!
xo Jessica