Peace In A Storm

I believe that peace is a gift from God. It is one of the most valuable and underappreciated experiences that we can have in our lives. No matter the storm or situation, you can experience peace in the midst of whatever, through burdens or victories. The disagreements and misunderstandings that can arise in marriages are numerous. If we follow God’s design for marriage and instructions, we can experience peace in a storm!

{You are in for a treat with a little ‘Tea with E’. Where my hubby, Eric, stops into guest post and give us a little peek into the male perspective.}

One of the principles I’ve held very closely is keeping the peace in my marriage. As the servant leader of my home, I own that. I try my best not go to bed carrying anger in my heart or mind towards anyone, especially my wife.

And “don’t sin by letting anger control you.” Don’t let the sun go down while you are still angry, for anger gives a foothold to the devil.
Ephesians 4:26-27 (NLT)

Ayanna and I have had very few major arguments over the years. I attribute that to a commitment towards peace for our home. Even when we were lost and living in sin, we had enough knowledge to not be cussing and fussing at each other. Both knowing nothing good could come from it.

However, we had a life-altering experience that cost us tremendously spiritually, emotionally, and financially. I’ll try to keep it brief, but I could literally write a book about it because everything I mentioned we experienced: the good, bad, and ugly!

Our Storm

Upon relocating yet again, we had to house hunt, which is not really fun when you’ve done it a couple times. In this instance, Ayanna had seen a hundred houses it seemed with our realtor with the plan for me to check out any she really liked. There was one house in particular that we both agreed on and we pursued it.

Fast forward, upon inspection, we discovered a lot of issues throughout the house. I was done with that property. Yet, Ayanna and several other family members influenced me to reconsider since the sellers were willing to make repairs. Everything in my Spirit told me that this was not the house and I still entertained how we could make it work.

It’s so crazy in hindsight because I hear from God often and I cannot believe in a big decision moment I thought we knew better. Ayanna and I were on the same page, but we allowed the pressure of time and outside influence to force us into a bad decision. Needless to say, we never closed on that house as more issues and barriers arose that ended in litigation!

That is where the peace we had between us unraveled and my pride was sky high because I let anger take over, and the devil got a foothold. Ayanna pleaded with me to let go of my anger and find a resolution as it was wearing on her tremendously. However, I felt I was right and justified in my mind for all of my actions to right the wrongs. Once Ayanna turned her anger towards me that’s when the Lord got my attention.

Finding Peace In A Storm

Better to live in the desert, a dry place of limited resources and intense heat. Or on a rooftop corner, a place of exposure to the elements and isolation, then with an angry wife.

It’s better to live alone in the desert than with a quarrelsome, complaining wife.
Proverbs 21:19 (NLT)

It is better to live in a corner of the housetop than in a house shared with a quarrelsome wife.
Proverbs 25:24 (ESV)

Life is challenging enough, why would I want to be in conflict with my wife over money and pride? She is more valuable to me than that.

Ayanna is more than my wife; she’s my best friend, mother of my children, cheerleader, coach, partner, collaborator, and so much more! Why would I want to risk losing my blessing in her helping me to navigate life or having my prayers hindered?

Husbands, likewise, dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life, that your prayers may not be hindered.
1 Peter 3:7 (NKJV)

With that whole ordeal, I believe my disobedience was the first domino to fall. I should have been obedient and continued to exercise my faith in Him who is able to do anything. My decision cost me dearly.

Yet, had I been the servant leader God called me to be and treated Ayanna according to the Word, I could have avoided such strife and conflict. Meeting her security needs as a wife didn’t require me to give in to her requests so to speak.

The peace we seek comes from the Father; it is a gift we receive in the name of Jesus that guards our hearts and minds! Not just in the good times, but we can also experience peace in a storm!