3 Simple Ways To Refresh Your Marriage

When you first get married you are so filled with love, hope, and excitement. The beauty and joy that you can experience in marriage is like nothing else. Yet what happens over time when those feeling change and real life starts to creep in? The newness starts to fade. The beauty starts to show its flaws. And the fresh feeling starts to need a refresh.

It happens to us all. For me, I have been there a few times. My husband, Eric, and I get into grooves that at first seem great, but then over time those grooves turn into boring routines. The most recent one was when all three of our daughters started full-time school. I had become a SAHM after having the twins and loved it.

Then once all the girls started school, I found myself with a little more time and started filling it up. Joined a women’s Bible study and started putting regular lunch dates with the hubby on my calendar as well. Things were going great, yet after a while even that got old. Every Monday through Friday started to look the same and our marriage lost its fresh feeling again.

We were going to the same lunch spots, having the same conversations, and just going through the motions. Not necessarily a bad thing, but not what I wanted. I did not want to be described as that ‘old married couple’.

You know that couple. That couple that maybe physically together, but miles apart. That couple that has lost its spark. This is where giving your marriage a refresh comes in.

Enjoy the wife you married as a young man!
Proverbs 5:18b (MSG)

Because the love, joy, and spark is there, it just needs to be reignited. So here are three simples ways to refresh your marriage today and help you get your spark back!

Let Your Husband Plan A Date Or A Trip

We often get stuck into routines because we are doing and planning the same things all the time. I do not know about you, but in my house I am the one that plans mostly everything. From what we eat, to what we do, to where we go.

As women, we often like to be the go-to person, but that also often leaves us eating, doing, and going to the same places all the time. So by letting our husband pick and plan the things, it helps to give you the marriage refresh you want.

I remember when Eric first suggested that we turn our no-kids getaway into a couples trip with two of our best friends.

I was both excited and apprehensive at the same time. It was exciting because he wanted to do something different and we had never traveled with friends before. It was also a little scary because we may not be able to get the alone time we needed and were used to. Yet, I forged ahead and it turned out to be the vacation of a lifetime. It was not only the marriage refresh we needed, but it helped to strengthen our friendships as well.

Eric made sure we balanced group time, alone time, and even made sure I got some girl time in there. Now I am looking forward to planning our next couples getaway.

So do not be afraid to let go of some of the planning and control in order to allow your marriage to grow and your husband to step up in new and exciting ways.

Refresh Your Marriage By Setting New Goals Together

As things change and time goes on, so do your goals. Both for yourself and for your marriage. The goals you set for yourselves at year one may be totally different from the goals you have at year 5, 10, and so on.

So make time to sit down together, dream together, set goals together and write them down. You will be amazed how taking time to set goals together can be fun and spark some new things in you.

Setting goals together also allows you to see how far you have come and goals you may have already checked off the list. While giving you fresh direction and commitment to help grow your marriage. Refreshing your marriage along the way as well.

Making A Marriage Vision Board Helps Refresh Your Marriage

This goes hand in hand with your goals. I love a good vision board. When I got the idea to make one with my husband just for our marriage, it was a game changer for us. A marriage vision board allows you to take your dreams and goals up a level.

There is just something so special about seeing your dream and vision in front of you. There is no dream or vision that is too big for your marriage. So dream big, dream boldly, and dream together.

Also remember that this should not be a one-time event. You should revisit your marriage vision board together often. Eric and I try to revisit it every year or so. Then every time we are in need of a marriage refresh we definitely pull our marriage vision board out and update where needed.

Marriage is a journey that goes through ups and downs. So every time you feel that your marriage could use a little spark and refresh remember to:

• Let your husband plan a date or trip
• Sit down to set goals together
• Make or update your marriage vision board

With every anniversary you celebrate, your marriage can be just a fun, joyful, and filled with as much spark as you want it to. So let’s commit to building and nurturing our marriage together.

I’d love to know how you refresh your marriage in the comments!